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What Do You Mean, "Delight" Yourself in the Lord?

When I woke up later than I intended to this morning, I immediately set into panic mode.

"I was supposed to work on my paper, now I'll NEVER get it done"

"I needed to workout this morning, now I'm going to gain 20 pounds!"

"Do I have enough time to spend time in the word? Now God's gonna hate me"

I'm pretty sure if you look up the definition of "psychopath" in the dictionary, you'll find my name.

These are real anxieties that consume my mind almost every morning. It doesn't really stop.

My mind LOVES to remind me of every little thing I need to accomplish in order to successfully live life, and reach the end goals my heart desires.

So, these thoughts circulated my mind, while my body silently thanked me for actually letting it sleep past 5:00 AM. That should've been a small victory, but the other voices nagging me about being miss straight A's or you're a failure, miss fitness or you'll never be skinny, and miss Holy, Holy, Holy or you're not really a Christian were drowning any sort of positive whispers that were trying to calm me.

Still in panic mode, I decided to get up and decide what to do first. Could I write a paragraph of my paper, do a few push-ups, and read a scripture or two before jumping in the shower? What should I accomplish first?

Well, of course, as if on autopilot, my body found itself in front of the coffee machine - its first stop. Caffeine always helps.

Also, I'm dogsitting, again.

Which I love. So I have this new house to explore and a new scenery to take in. I make my coffee and find myself checking out the back deck which overlooks a beautiful, spacious backyard that leads to a seemingly endless wooded forest.

As a girl who grew up with a similar backyard and cows down the road, this brought my heart a huge sense of peace. This is why I'll never be a city girl.

I decided to take my cup of coffee to one of the chairs, and plopped myself in it to simply take in the slight breeze of the trees and the familiar, calming chirps of the birds.

Suddenly, I wasn't worried about losing twenty pounds, or what grade I'll get on my paper, or what I'm supposed to be doing with my life. I let these worries fly with the breeze, and tried to embrace every peaceful moment.

That's when this verse came to my mind:

"Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4

I always thought that delighting yourself in the Lord meant checking off my Christian, good-girl to do list:

1. Read my Bible.

2. Pray.

3. Listen to Christian podcasts.

4. Think about God every second.

5. Don't do this, or that, or this, or that - WHAT WOULD JESUS DO?!

Obviously these are important. BUT, I was stressing myself out trying to accomplish all of this so that God will finally see me as deserving of the dream life I want.

If I just read just one more devotion, I'll finally meet my husband!

If I just pray five minutes longer, I'll finally convince my dad to get us a dog!

If I just ... If I just ... If I just ...

Sound familiar?!

Panic mode.....

This morning, God showed me differently.

Delighting in the Lord is not trying to impress Him to get what you want.

It's simply taking the time to embrace the blessings He has given you. It's taking in the moments and trusting that He's in control, no matter what. It's taking every moment to soak in His peace and His love, knowing that He sees you, and He loves you. And NOTHING can change that.

So, I may not get a perfect score on this next paper. I may not look like a Kardashian any time soon. I may not be miss goody-two shoes perfect Christian.

BUT, I have peace. I have peace that God is in control.

We aren't guaranteed tomorrow. I don't know what my future holds, but I do know that I can embrace today with the reassurance that there is peace in the midst of madness.

So, take time today. Delight in the Lord. And feel the peace that passes all understanding.

x o x o


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